Silk Road forums

Discussion => Off topic => Topic started by: fuckingACE on February 25, 2013, 03:11 am

Title: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: fuckingACE on February 25, 2013, 03:11 am
RIGHTTTTTTTTTT.

Were bringing back our amazingly popular double order joke competition.

Startiiing NOW.

The 4 people to tell us the funniest joke will get their order doubled all the way up to 50g, When I say funny I mean like it has to make my team piss themselves. The best selected jokes will be posted up here.

Offer is valid for all hash types and Weed only!!. Competition will close in 48 hrs.

ACE


Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: This Is Serious Mum on February 25, 2013, 07:27 am
Q: What is the difference between erotic and kinky?
A: Erotic is using a feather....kinky is using the whole chicken.

I know, I know.....*turns away in shame*
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: SelfSovereignty on February 25, 2013, 07:33 am
Ernest asks Frank how long he has been working for the company.
    "Ever since they threatened to fire me."

... I hate weed anyway; cool of you to offer and all though :)
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: TrashBox on February 25, 2013, 08:15 am
kinky is using the whole chicken.

I like dirty jokes
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: klm2233 on February 25, 2013, 08:10 pm
hope you like it :D had to laugh hard xD

Q: What do u call a bunny with a bent dick? A: FUCKS FUNNY

aaaaaaand: Q: What's the job application to Hooters? A: They just give you a bra and say: Here, fill this out.  :D :D :D



looking forward to do business with you guys again,
cheers
klm2233

Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: TrashBox on February 25, 2013, 09:10 pm

Q: What do u call a bunny with a bent dick? A: FUCKS FUNNY

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL OMFG I LOVE ITTTTTTT!

I'm also stoned so that may be working in your favor...

klm2233 is cool :-* :-*

Anybody else?

One day left......
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: RobertMcLure on February 26, 2013, 12:17 am
what a shame i can't tell jokes ;D

great acion guys!  :D  LOL'd already!!
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: White 0ut on February 26, 2013, 12:26 am
Already posted this in another comedy/lotto  thread, It is a story that is nasty/funny but definitely worth a read! Lmao It kills me every time I tell it!

this didnt happen to me it happend to my friend but its literally one of the nastiest things iv ever heard so im gona tell it!

so my friend met this girl at a party, me and a few of the girls knew her from around the area and she has a bit of a rep for being a dirt, which we told him, to which he replied " great a night of dirty sex it is for me so"

he went home with her that night and they did the bizzness, the next day when i saw him i noticed he had a weird black spot above his lip, where he had had a cold sore that was beginning to clear up, i asked him why it was black and he said he didnt know, he thought it was just the cold sore scabbing over, we thought no more about it

i seen him again a day or 2 later and the black spot had now tripled in size it was about the size of a thumb nail at this stage and raised a fair bit off his face and discusting looking, i asked him what the fuck was going on with his face and he said he didnt know but the spot was really itchy, i booked him an appointment with the doctor because i really didnt like the look of it & thought it bit strange that it only flared up after he had been with that grimey girl, i went with him to the doctors with him

the doctor had no idea what it was or why it was black and refered him to the hospital to have it lanced, i also went with him to this appintment wich was 2 days later, the spot had gotten even bigger at this stage and he said it felt like it was moving in the inside

so he went in to have it lanced and when they did it a mass of tiny insects came out of it all over his face!!!

the dirty bitch had crabs and they had gotten into the cold sore somehow and had been muntiplying under there thats why it felt like it was moving on the inside because it literally was!

so guys the motto of the story is if you have a cold sore beware of dirty bitches with crabs because you might get an infestation of them on your face!

Lmao mine is meant to be a joke because it is funny as fuck especially to me, but it's more of a story! Hope quality counts!
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 12:54 am
FUCKING GOLD MAN

I am SO SKEEEEVED right now... I feel itchy all over.

FUCKING SICK. WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF

I can't wait to retell this mess of a story to all my friends.

Oh, and congrats on the roulette  :) you've been winning a lot lately  8) maybe you should go to Vegas.

Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: White 0ut on February 26, 2013, 01:00 am
@trashbox lmao yes spread the word it will most definitely help reduce std's haha! I had to chime in!

So have I won the double down match order? If so I will be placing a order for 50grams of Moroccan, if that is acceptable for you all  and you guys can double it up to 100 if I am a winner!
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: klm2233 on February 26, 2013, 01:03 am
@TB: makes me happy that you lol'd that hard on my joke :-P

@whiteout: for my liking this is too damn nasty. WTF :/ :D :D
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: White 0ut on February 26, 2013, 01:07 am
@TB: makes me happy that you lol'd that hard on my joke :-P

@whiteout: for my liking this is too damn nasty. WTF :/ :D :D

Haha well it is the deep web so I figured it was acceptable haha, at least now you will scope the cooter out before you go slamming your face in it!
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: zipstyle on February 26, 2013, 01:36 am
To White Out: I ALWAYS scope the cooter out. There's a story that I know that can reinforce those words of wisdom but I don't think it's a good one for the comedy thread.

My joke:
Bungee jumping is like getting a blowjob off your granny, It feels great but for christs sake don't look down.
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: This Is Serious Mum on February 26, 2013, 02:40 am


Ok...one more attempt:

Two guys are walking down the street and see a dog on the lawn, licking his balls.

One guy says to the other, "Man, I sure wish I could do that".

The other guy says, "Don't you think you ought to pat him first?"
 
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: HEATFan on February 26, 2013, 03:38 am
Whats the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

Snowballs...


...I'll show myself out. 
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: This Is Serious Mum on February 26, 2013, 04:24 am
Whats the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

Snowballs...


...I'll show myself out.

↑↑ 'I'll show myself out  ↑↑.....That made me laughhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 06:40 am
I'm not ignoring you guys... I've been revisiting this thread to read and LOL

I think ACE wanted the jokes submitted with the orders... but I'm not 100% sure at this point. Since I've smoked a bowl and it's almost bedtime... but that means

ACE will be awake soon :) and we'll let you all know WHO WON   8)
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: White 0ut on February 26, 2013, 06:57 am
Your cool TB! The whole community should really get behind vendors that do things like this and other specials so we can have more and more! It only benefits us! Yeah I suppose my bedtime bowl is almost here as well! Night!
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: klm2233 on February 26, 2013, 05:24 pm
so TB and ACE please inform me if i won the challenge :)

Would really welcome to win the prize :P
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: TrashBox on February 27, 2013, 12:46 am
 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) WINNERS  8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

White Out (that was such a fucked up joke  :o I think I'll have nightmares forever.... oh, and GO TO VEGAS)

klm2233  ;)

This Is Serious Mum (THIS IS SERIOUS MOM)

ZipStyle  8) 8) 8) 8)


ENJOY YOUR DOUBLE ORDER POTHEADS





Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: This Is Serious Mum on February 27, 2013, 12:59 am
8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) WINNERS  8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

White Out (that was such a fucked up joke  :o I think I'll have nightmares forever.... oh, and GO TO VEGAS)

klm2233  ;)

This Is Serious Mum (THIS IS SERIOUS MOM)

ZipStyle  8) 8) 8) 8)


ENJOY YOUR DOUBLE ORDER POTHEADS

Thank you TrashBox.

Appreciate the competition!
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: klm2233 on February 27, 2013, 01:00 am
THAT totally ROCKS :D

Big up TSC, you are great people!

Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: jagfug on February 27, 2013, 02:16 am
A Puerto Rican, a Pakistani and a white guy are at the top of the Empire State building admiring the view. The white guy says, "Watch this" and proceeds to jump off, yet flies around and returns to the platform, and says, "See? It's easy! There's updraft winds that carry you! Hearing this the Pakistani says "I want to try". And takes the leap, yet falls to his death,

A few moment's later the Puerto Rican guy turns to the white guy and says. "Superman, you son of a bitch!"
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: zipstyle on February 27, 2013, 02:20 am
8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) WINNERS  8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

White Out (that was such a fucked up joke  :o I think I'll have nightmares forever.... oh, and GO TO VEGAS)

klm2233  ;)

This Is Serious Mum (THIS IS SERIOUS MOM)

ZipStyle  8) 8) 8) 8)


ENJOY YOUR DOUBLE ORDER POTHEADS


WOO! Thank you, TB!
Glad you guys liked my joke 8) 8)
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: TrashBox on February 27, 2013, 02:59 am
Awesome People. Awesome Jokes. Awesome Winners. Awesome Thread.


Thanks for playin' everyone  :-* :-* :-*
Title: Re: COMPOOOO TIME
Post by: RobertMcLure on February 28, 2013, 12:54 am
Lovin' the work of the crew!  8)
edit: wow, can't believe it went that easy!  :o  graaats to the winners, glad for u guys!  :-*