Silk Road forums

Discussion => Off topic => Topic started by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 01:14 am

Title: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 01:14 am
As the title suggests, i am looking for information on a quality 'fake beard' supplier.

If anyone can offer some suggestions, it would be highly appreciated.

Thanks!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 01:39 am
the title of this thread genuinely made me laugh. ask your local theatre group, fake beards aren't illegal! yahoo questions would probably be more useful than here
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: scout on February 26, 2013, 01:41 am
looking for a quality fake beard supplier?  aren't we all, my friend, aren't we all ...

:P
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 01:51 am
i've seriously been all over the net looking, i may have been conditioned by SR but they all look like scams to me! lol

although i really do need a well made, high quality 'fake beard'.

reasons will be left alone as they would incriminate me and nullify my future plans.

i'll continue searching the web though, theatrical companies is a good idea, although some charge thousands of dollars for their work from what ive seen.

i was hoping someone on here has already gone through it all and found a decent supplier at a good price...
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: PrincessHIGH on February 26, 2013, 01:59 am
Ebay there's loads of choices ranging from your captain sparrow to your santa claus, all the best with your bearded quest :)
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 02:12 am
been all over ebay, cheap and nasty seems to be top priority there... :)

thanks for the suggestion though princess

*continues searching*
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 02:13 am
A beard, eh?

I imagine I could ask Ace to shave his balls and we could do a custom listing for ya... interested?


JK JK JK JK JK JK JK
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: dex on February 26, 2013, 02:14 am

although i really do need a well made, high quality 'fake beard'.

reasons will be left alone as they would incriminate me and nullify my future plans.

haha this sounds so sketchy
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 02:17 am
fucking LOL - nice mate :)

im after a BEARD, not a MIRKIN!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: White 0ut on February 26, 2013, 02:18 am
A beard, eh?

I imagine I could ask Ace to shave his balls and we could do a custom listing for ya... interested?


JK JK JK JK JK JK JK

Seriously though the listing is up on TSC seller page just look for the title:
" Fallkniven custome listing---Half Price Pube Beard 100% Real Uncut 99% Pure imported Pubes!"

Lmfaoo
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 02:22 am
btw, i grow my own beard just fine, 2 months = 6 inches. if left alone for more than 3 months, people think i'm a terrorist - a real Al Queda Bin Laden beard, lol

the fake beard is for a paranoid business associate.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: HEATFan on February 26, 2013, 02:27 am
I'm subbing to this thread. I have been searching everywhere for a nice fake beard. When will the Gods of SR finally listen? It is god damned time we had a good beard vendor.

I mean c'mon... I and probably the majority of SR would pay good money for even a half decent beard. How are they so hard to come by these days? Ever since that last bust of '98 beards have been increasingly difficult to come across especially in my area and everyone that has them is too sketchy for me to deal with.

I dunno guys, I'm just sick of it. Sometimes I wonder if the world is out to get me. I've traveled all over the Road and have yet to find a beard. Please hear our plea someone on SR and share the love. Beards are meant for all.

Except women. If we start giving women beards then next thing you know they'll be sleeping with the blacks.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 02:40 am
do women with beards bother you? you really dont want to meet my grandmother then, shes got a nasty little goatee AND she married a pacific islander.

if you think thats bad, you should see my mother :P she got "The Bearded Lady" fired from her circus act, lol
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: oldtoby on February 26, 2013, 02:51 am
Stick to the Road. My buddy got a beard off the street and it turned out to be one of those cheap-ass RBs (research beards). Where's my buddy now? The psycho ward. He's in there, pulling at his whiskers, mumbling, masturbating furiously.

It could happen to you.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 03:01 am
this is the best thread ever :D
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 03:05 am
i have to admit, there have been some farken funny responses, sarcasm or not, funny shit :)

research beards - lol

*continues searching for faux beards*
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 03:13 am
I'm subbing to this thread. I have been searching everywhere for a nice fake beard. When will the Gods of SR finally listen? It is god damned time we had a good beard vendor.

I mean c'mon... I and probably the majority of SR would pay good money for even a half decent beard. How are they so hard to come by these days? Ever since that last bust of '98 beards have been increasingly difficult to come across especially in my area and everyone that has them is too sketchy for me to deal with.

I dunno guys, I'm just sick of it. Sometimes I wonder if the world is out to get me. I've traveled all over the Road and have yet to find a beard. Please hear our plea someone on SR and share the love. Beards are meant for all.

Except women. If we start giving women beards then next thing you know they'll be sleeping with the blacks.

LOL U R A FUNNY MAN... be honest, how long did it take you to come up with that?

I've seen some funny shit today, but that was pretty good.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: HEATFan on February 26, 2013, 03:15 am
i have to admit, there have been some farken funny responses, sarcasm or not, funny shit :)

research beards - lol

*continues searching for faux beards*

Yo them research beards ain't nothin to joke 'bout now. Last time I got me one of them unevenly laid RBs and it left the worst rash on my face. Do not fuck with RBs until you've done your research on them. Speaking of is anyone planning on selling any beard testing kits?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 04:18 am
this is the best thread ever :D

I knew you'd say that slaaaaaaaaaagggggggggggggggggggg

 :-* :-*
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 04:44 am
you shlaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6T4X1CMZpi0
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 05:42 am
you shlaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6T4X1CMZpi0

LOL BRITSSSSSS

Say something funny about the queen and beards ...
GO!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 05:48 am
that's a tough one! kate middleton is our favourite royal beard
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 06:08 am
that's a tough one! kate middleton is our favourite royal beard

LOL

I can't even take you right now bitch

I wonder if queeny keeps it bald?

OH SHIT... are we not in a PM anymore?

Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 06:29 am
liz would have a helper to do that shit, a very unlucky helper.

prolly harry :P
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: flaxceed on February 26, 2013, 06:30 am
looking for a quality fake beard supplier?  aren't we all, my friend, aren't we all ...

:P

I've been looking for years too.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 06:35 am
errrr generation gap wouldn't have thought so......
frankie boyle got a lot of complaints on a tv panel show for things the queen might say during her xmas speech, he came up with "I'm now so old that my pussy is haunted."
we will have the wrath of the royalists upon us along with the anti drugs nuts if we don't pipe down about her majesty hahaha
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 06:58 am
we will have the wrath of the royalists upon us along with the anti drugs nuts if we don't pipe down about her majesty hahaha


 :o  8)  :P  ::)  >:(  ;D  :'(  ;D  :o

So many emotions Ron... the GODDAMN beard ad (wtf? is Falknivin your alias?), fucking queeny after me. gay princes and shit

Also, stop shaking like a dog shittin' razor blades and SWING LIFE AWAY


PS: The Spice girls are awesome.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 07:14 am
i love you so much right now!!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 07:47 am
i love you so much right now!!

I wanna ZIGA ZIG AHHHH

Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 08:09 am
spice up your life! did s club 7 ever make it stateside? they were amazing. there ain't no party like an s club partyyyyyy

derailing again. beards. i recently learned that beards and their length/grooming are a sign of religious status in islamic culture. mubarak banned them. i would have done the same in his position. can't understand why everyone's so down on the guy, beards are horrible.
OP could your associate use a niqab to disguise himself instead of a beard?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 08:25 am
*startpage's "niqab"*

Niqāb - ummm no, seeing as though he's a he and he's a whitey. (there ya go pig profilers, smoke that ya cunts)

thanks anyway mate :)
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 08:42 am
you can only see eyes, pop in some brown contacts and a bit of a brown smudge you're good to go. male terrorists/crims use this method to avoid recognition in saudi, pakistan and whatnot
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: White 0ut on February 26, 2013, 08:54 am
Idk if I would recommend the niqab I feel it would only draw more attention lmao
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: White 0ut on February 26, 2013, 08:58 am
Good News OP! I have found a reliable source for 100% real glue on beards/facial hair kits. I can tell you that they are actually not cheap but look 1000000% authentic. If you are really interested PM me
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 09:32 am
@ White Out - PM sent
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 04:21 pm
White Out- why would you JACK this thread with ACTUAL KNOWLEDGE.

dick.


 ;) ;)
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 05:05 pm
init white out totally murdered this awesome thread. beardy twat :D i expected to wake up to some more lols, you have left me disappointed. white out, you are now joe wilkinson in my head. i hope you know who that is and i hope you feel the shame you have brought upon your family and community with your pro beard agenda.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 06:15 pm

FUCK YOU GUYS and your face beards

Ron (lol, RON IS A SHE) has sourced some seriously DANK pubes (ask her how, maybe she'll tell you  :o ) and has approached TSC about listing them for her. We call these PUSSY BEARDS .

Good for the girl who:
1) would like to impersonate the queen's majestic PUSSY
2) would like to cyber in SR Chatrooms ,
   2a) that way your pussy can stay anony ;)
   2b)also good for hiding your penis, since everyone KNOWS there are no girls in the chat rooms

Not good for the girl who:
1) wants her box licked
2) wants her box touched
3) wants her box looked at
4) wants her box to not resemble a monkey
5) wants her box fucked ever again

Couple things:
1) Anyone who promises to POST PICS and a full review will receive a free sample.
2) Do not PGP your addy. Pussy Beards will be shipped telepathically. 
2) We are still crunching numbers but would like input from our loyal customers. Give us an idea of what you would like to pay for this RARE commodity...



Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Rowsdower on February 26, 2013, 06:25 pm
I can't recommend any of the current quality fake beard suppliers, there's just too much uncertainty in the marketplace and they all demand FE.  However, I have devised an ingenious 5 step plan for anyone who wants to become their own fake beard supplier, and you don't have to be male to do this.

Step 1 : Grow long pubes
Step 2 : Cut off said pubes
Step 3: Apply superglue to face or onto some strips of tape with glue on the other side.
Step 4: ?
Step 5: PROFIT
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 06:45 pm
2) Do not PGP your addy. Pussy Beards will be shipped telepathically. 
ahaha i smiled (and cringed!) the whole way through then got to this and LMFAO

also "FUCK YOU STACY MERKIN YOU FUCKING VAGINA WIG!!"
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 07:46 pm
2) Do not PGP your addy. Pussy Beards will be shipped telepathically. 
ahaha i smiled (and cringed!) the whole way through then got to this and LMFAO

also "FUCK YOU STACY MERKIN YOU FUCKING VAGINA WIG!!"

AHHHHH SHIT... that's the only joke I can't take credit for.... that gem came from our review thread:

To fuckingACE/The Crew/Trashbox:
Thanks TSC my opium review may be up as soon as tomorrow depending on if your sending it in the mail this time or teleporting it instantly like you did with my hash!!

norseman17! somebody get that guy in here
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 08:00 pm
lolol make yer box resemble a monkey got me too ;D
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 08:24 pm
just regarding the comment about vaginas looking like monkeys -

1 - rofl

2 - its all pink on the inside when yer wasted
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 09:00 pm
i think vajayjays are ugly and i'm a dyke! flower.. pffft my arse
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: isthereanyneed on February 26, 2013, 09:12 pm
I know a guy that might know a guy but cant give details on here, even pgp is to risky, if your really serious about the fake beard then PM and I will send you a number this is the start of a code you must crack in order to prove you are not LE, if you pass this test we then may be able to help you,  destroy your laptop after reading this but get a new one for the second message I will send then destroy that one too and so on, its the only way we can stay safe, trust no one especially those guys at wilkinsons and gillette.

Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 09:20 pm
just regarding the comment about vaginas looking like monkeys -

1 - rofl

2 - its all pink on the inside when yer wasted

I imagine a hairy vagina could resemble all kinds of things while wasted...  :o :o :o

Just ask Ronzooooo LOL

RON. LOG OUT AND DO THIS NOW

1) take drugs
2) go to pub
3) pick up hairiest monster chick you can find and take her home
4) STARE AT HER BEARDED BOX
5) log in and tell us jokes about it
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on February 26, 2013, 09:35 pm
1) take drugs
2) go to pub
3) pick up hairiest monster chick you can find and take her home
4) TAKE PICTURES OF HER BEARDED BOX
5) log in and post the images to laugh and make jokes at

there we go, fixed :P
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: BreakOnThrough on February 26, 2013, 09:59 pm
The misinformation propagated by government agencies only goes to endanger and stigmatise normal, working, law abiding people who simply want to wear some quality facial hair at the weekend to make themselves FEEL GOOD.

People get hurt from piss poor kitchen made beards every day because of these crazy laws.  THIS BULLSHIT WAR ON FAUX BEARDS MUST END
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 26, 2013, 10:52 pm
the only drugs i have at my disposal is a shit ton of valium :( no fun and as much as i would love to share stories and pictures of unkempt 'ginas with all of you i'm not picking up some hairy lezzer without trekking into soho and soho is sleazeee. and i don't kiss n tell ;)
anywho i'm having a family feast before sending my bro to the middle east and hoping he comes back in one piece ALREEET!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 26, 2013, 11:10 pm
Can't be too sure Miss Ronzo will have her hands available for picture taking...

LOL, when you logged out I thought 'I bet that CRAZY BITCH will actually do it!!!  8)  ;D '

Have fun at the Family Feast GL to yo bro, sista  :-* :-*
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 27, 2013, 12:30 am
haha you wish, closet case!! ;)
just thinking about some 70's porno style hairy vag is makin you wet init brrrr
and i'm sure my bro will be fine, he's rockin a bit of a beard, he'll blend in :D
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: axeman on February 27, 2013, 01:44 am
Be careful and make sure you have the beard tested by a local lab right away.

The last beard I purchased was labeled "made in UK"  but upon IR analysis it was found to be made with materials only sourced in China. There was obvious adulteration with melamine which unfortunately I ingested while wearing this beard out for dinner one night along with elevated levels of the heavy metal cadmium. It turns out that the cadmium had been fed to the hair donor in China as a result of contaminated batches of the mineral supplement zinc sulphate, which was added to the donor's food. The sad part is I didn't realize anything was wrong until after wearing the beard for 48hrs straight. A rash developed from these foreign materials or was caused by the poisonous chemical diethylene glycol, and contaminated wheat gluten which had also found its way into the glue used to attached the hair. The scarring on my chin left by this is horrific. Another material found in the fibrous material of the mane was lead. I think this explains the brain damage; nervous system disorders; memory and concentration problems; I'm experiencing.  I get seizures, go unconsciousness, and I'm afraid death will be coming quicker than I had hoped in my life. Sadly, the only thing the lab could find related to the UK in this beard was a mysterious DNA chain structure only found in Welsh ponies; further testing on this is required.

Buyer's beware or you could be faced with the same trouble I am!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: shakedown street on February 27, 2013, 01:05 pm
Does Silk Road have a "Beards, Fake" category?
Can't figure out where to list them.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on February 27, 2013, 01:50 pm
forgeries or apparel 8)
if you got some proper chronic beards i'm sure the gods at sr will make a special category
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Smashmouth on February 27, 2013, 04:31 pm
You should ask Ron Paul about a custom beard synth.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on February 27, 2013, 07:01 pm
ok, first of, I know Ron already said this but I FUCKING LOVE THIS THREAD

I love waking up to you people's ridiculous senses of humor. I could hang out here all day and laugh my ass off just talking shit with you guys... unfortunately I have to work  ::)

But tonight (when I'm stoned) I'm going to come back here and +1 the shit out of all of you.

LATER
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: White 0ut on February 27, 2013, 08:13 pm
You should ask Ron Paul about a custom beard synth.

I fucking love this +REP
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Be_content on February 27, 2013, 08:54 pm
awesome thread.

Hair is unfortunately very and very very expensive. to have it crafted into a beard would cost a lot, unless you just want a santa clause beard made mostly of shitty synthetic materials.  Look at the price of hair extensions... the price is rediculous.. but to have a proper fake beard with real hair would cost a fortune (1 grand+++). Perhpas theres some good fake substitutes, 

I HAVE A MUCH MUCH BETTER SOLUTION.... they have these old man masks and they are not tooooo expensive, theyre completely legit and ive seen one with my own eyes in a stage performance, theyre very skin tight though, i would feel claustophobic. if youre white though then you have option, but if youre black like myself, then you might run into problems finding an appropriate mask because of all the mixing and colours of black these days.

Cheers.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: XXXotica on February 28, 2013, 02:45 pm
Ebay there's loads of choices ranging from your captain sparrow to your santa claus, all the best with your bearded quest :)

lol, I got a great chuckle from this one!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on March 01, 2013, 04:04 am
forgeries or apparel 8)
if you got some proper chronic beards i'm sure the gods at sr will make a special category

LICK MY TRASHBOX
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on March 01, 2013, 01:21 pm
FILTH! keep it clean like charlie sheen :D
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on March 01, 2013, 04:30 pm
FILTH! keep it clean like charlie sheen :D

Oh, I definitely am. Thanks to you Slaaaaaaaaaaagggg is now a part of my everyday vocabulary. I'm probably offending people constantly.

 I have NO IDEA what it means  ::)  just that it's used by some crazy ass brit bitch that I cyber-love  :-*
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on March 01, 2013, 04:56 pm
hahaha awesome. i've picked up a shit ton of americanisms off the net and straight up invent words. as long as i don't start saying aluminum, elevator and sidewalk it's fine. i said to a girl the other day "i'll smoke you out" she was like wtf? like i'm going fox hunting and the bastards won't come out their holes, smoke 'em out... it's just like calling someone a whore or slut. i didn't even realise slag was british! if anyone questions it say it's an affectionate insult like calling your best mate a crabs infested fuckwit ;D
just watch gavin and stacey while stoned you will want to move here you slaaaaaag "fags and weed, glue an speed, but i draws the line at crack"
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: XXXotica on March 14, 2013, 02:11 pm
Any luck on the conquest of becoming known as the gentleman with the most dapper facial hair in the SR nation?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on March 14, 2013, 08:46 pm
No conquest was needed to begin with friend, such facial pubes grow on this chin that sasquatch itself would run in fear ;)

Twas the friend with little testosterone in his body that needed the face merkin. And when he realised that he would be paying up to a thousand dollars for a quality set, decided to not bother.

Actually, he asked about TrashBox's pubes, was it one coin per pound that you quoted us TB? Can't remember...

:P
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: laplace on March 19, 2013, 04:27 pm
If we start giving women beards then next thing you know they'll be ...
... wanting balls.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on April 13, 2013, 04:20 pm
ahahaha iim listening to my favourite beardy band 4 year strong and sought out ths thread pretty fucked on ket. fun. someone revive funny forum times!!! i have not what it takes to initiate. still the best thread ever.  :D :D
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on April 13, 2013, 08:20 pm
ahahaha iim listening to my favourite beardy band 4 year strong and sought out ths thread pretty fucked on ket. fun. someone revive funny forum times!!! i have not what it takes to initiate. still the best thread ever.  :D :D

Biatcchhh, you are right.  somebody needs to revive this place. and if it's not going to be you, who then? Razzy? fallkniven? WHO??

We need to make this a party again. SCREW THE CHATROOM. Forumzzzz is where it's at YO

Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on April 13, 2013, 09:01 pm
ahahaha iim listening to my favourite beardy band 4 year strong and sought out ths thread pretty fucked on ket. fun. someone revive funny forum times!!! i have not what it takes to initiate. still the best thread ever.  :D :D

Biatcchhh, you are right.  somebody needs to revive this place. and if it's not going to be you, who then? Razzy? fallkniven? WHO??

We need to make this a party again. SCREW THE CHATROOM. Forumzzzz is where it's at YO



WHO LIKES TO ROCK THE PARTY?
WE LIKE TO ROCK THE PARTY!
offshoot thread.. people? topic? suggestions?

p.s. sit on my face
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on April 13, 2013, 09:20 pm
"A beard is the collection of hair that grows on the chin, upper lip, cheeks and neck of human beings and some non-human animals. In humans, usually only pubescent or adult males are able to grow beards. However, women with hirsutism may develop a beard. When differentiating between upper and lower facial hair, a beard specifically excludes the moustache.
Over the course of history, men with facial hair have been ascribed various attributes such as wisdom, sexual virility, masculinity, or a higher status; however, beards may also be perceived to be associated with a lack of general cleanliness and a loss of refinement, particularly in modern times."



So i'm wise, sexually virile and masculine. I may also be perceived as being "dirty" and "unrefined", like a bad batch of smack ;)
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on April 13, 2013, 09:28 pm
Epictetus "affirmed the philosopher's beard as something almost sacred...to express the idea that philosophy is no mere intellectual hobby but rather a way of life that, by definition, transforms every aspect of one's behavior, including one's shaving habits. If someone continues to shave in order to look the part of a respectable Roman citizen, it is clear that they have not yet embraced philosophy conceived as a way of life and have not yet escaped the social customs of the majority...the true philosopher will only act according to reason or according to nature, rejecting the arbitrary conventions that guide the behavior of everyone else."
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on April 13, 2013, 11:39 pm
SWEET JESUS I TALK A LOT! Dumbledore's beard was pretty fucking impressive though to be fair, on the subject...

too many words for my eyes! fallkniven, i humbly welcome you, come rest upon our collective bosom but like.... be a bit less wordy mate ;)
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on April 13, 2013, 11:47 pm
okey dokey
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: ChemCat on April 14, 2013, 12:03 am
**Cleanet Warning**   (Beards)
http://www.maskworld.com/english/products/beards
**Clearnet Warning**  (Beards)









LOL




Peace,



ChemCat

O0
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on April 14, 2013, 12:09 am
aw i feel a bit harsh now. kets worn off and i can process written language again lol are you single? can we have movie nights and shit. kitkat's always bailing on me to do naughty things with men behind closed doors. everyone's coupling. it's buldog(yeah i'm starting that and it does mean bullshit) i am so lonelyyyy i just want a friend JUST ONE FRIEND please be my friend please please please
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: PotatoConnoisseur on April 14, 2013, 12:22 am
I used to think this thread was the just a joke. I'm not laughing anymore, fake beards are a hot commodity and I'm in the market. Expensive stuff but worth it in my opinion.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on April 14, 2013, 12:33 am
AHHHH potato connoisseur, we finally meet! i have admired your name from afar, i too am greatly passionate about potatoes. what are your top 5 favourite potato based dishes? spill, i want details. the more graphic the better.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: buldogTvb on April 14, 2013, 01:06 am
AHHHH potato connoisseur, we finally meet! i have admired your name from afar, i too am greatly passionate about potatoes. what are your top 5 favourite potato based dishes? spill, i want details. the more graphic the better.

ahahha
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on April 14, 2013, 03:00 am

p.s. sit on my face

whoaaaa, seriously? FFS, swanson... was it the secret  ::) boob pic share that finally brought you around?  GOD FUCKING DAMNIT if that's all i needed to get a RonSwanson FACEride i would never have tried to impress you with my RISE AGAINST #1 fan status OR recite Spice Girls lyrics via PM along with all your other groupies. I feel so FOOLISH  :'(

SHIT... is this is the beard thread?... Ron, you've LIKELY picked up a quality piece by now, right? We gonna make this happen or what?

PS: pending ronzo's reply... i may be looking for a quality fake beard ride supplier. Serious inquiries only.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on April 14, 2013, 03:23 am
fake beard ride supplier? i got a "real" beard ride if you want to have a go, you gotta be "this high" to enter though ;)
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: TrashBox on April 14, 2013, 05:04 am
fake beard ride supplier? i got a "real" beard ride if you want to have a go, you gotta be "this high" to enter though ;)

'this high' boyyy, I am ALWAYS 'this high'... are you high? come be high with me :) what were we talking about?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: sbmafia on April 14, 2013, 05:23 am
I used to think this thread was the just a joke. I'm not laughing anymore, fake beards are a hot commodity and I'm in the market. Expensive stuff but worth it in my opinion.


Hahahaha

I can provide real attachable limbs (arms, legs) for a price
 :P :P :P :P
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on April 14, 2013, 05:45 am

p.s. sit on my face

whoaaaa, seriously? FFS, swanson... was it the secret  ::) boob pic share that finally brought you around?  GOD FUCKING DAMNIT if that's all i needed to get a RonSwanson FACEride i would never have tried to impress you with my RISE AGAINST #1 fan status OR recite Spice Girls lyrics via PM along with all your other groupies. I feel so FOOLISH  :'(

SHIT... is this is the beard thread?... Ron, you've LIKELY picked up a quality piece by now, right? We gonna make this happen or what?

PS: pending ronzo's reply... i may be looking for a quality fake beard ride supplier. Serious inquiries only.

come on now. music is the way to my heart. was that pic even necessary lol drop a dave hause ref and i drop everything. you can have the ride of your fucking life.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: jundullahi on May 12, 2013, 12:28 am
btw, i grow my own beard just fine, 2 months = 6 inches. if left alone for more than 3 months, people think i'm a terrorist - a real Al Queda Bin Laden beard, lol

the fake beard is for a paranoid business associate.

Then you should also trim you mustache. Because that would Muslim do. The grow there beards but trim the
mustaches. Trust me I know
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: KitKatisBorednow on May 12, 2013, 12:56 am
I WANT RANCH DRESSING!!!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on May 12, 2013, 01:02 am
I WANT RANCH DRESSING!!!

is that some cryptic way of telling us you're crabs infested or something?! just shave it off, saves a trip to the shop... slag
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on May 12, 2013, 02:38 am
:P beard lovers unite

i couldnt help posting in that new beard thread - i'm not a beard threat slut or anything so...


BEARD
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: WatLanBoon on May 12, 2013, 04:53 am
as a youth i always saw beards as rapey, now im grown i know they are rapey & itchy.

asians hate beards, cos they fail at growing them and therefore despise anyone who has or can grow one. (but then asians pretty much despise anyone who isnt drunk and throwing money around)

i hate shaving but i hate itching worse

(almost as much as i hate religious fans who feel the need to declare their fanaticism everywhere despite almost no-one wanting to hear it)

 MOSQUES for example - why the eff do i have to hear that noisy wailing for miles around 5 times a day?? surely im being terrorised by having no choice but to endure it...) OFFTOPIC rant over.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on May 12, 2013, 05:33 am
prayer calls are more noise pollution than terrorism. churches do that bell ringing shit all the fucking time, drives me insane. at least the mosques are predictably regular and don't last too long. kinda hums in the background.
facial hair longer than like 3mm... just shave that shit off before you look like a trainspotter.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: KitKatisBorednow on May 12, 2013, 06:07 am
prayer calls are more noise pollution than terrorism. churches do that bell ringing shit all the fucking time, drives me insane. at least the mosques are predictably regular and don't last too long. kinda hums in the background.
facial hair longer than like 3mm... just shave that shit off before you look like a trainspotter.

JESUS THAT IS HILARIOUS AS FUCK.

I WANT RANCH DRESSING!!!

is that some cryptic way of telling us you're crabs infested or something?! just shave it off, saves a trip to the shop... slag

LOL LOL LOL

HAHAHAHAAHA...I DID JUST GO LIKE...BALD EAGLE RECENTLY!!! How did you know?!?! My pussy is so nice and smooth right now...And I can't find anyone to fuck who doesn't want to murder me and wear my skin.  FML...seriously.  I may as well show you then.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on May 12, 2013, 06:27 am
prayer calls are more noise pollution than terrorism. churches do that bell ringing shit all the fucking time, drives me insane. at least the mosques are predictably regular and don't last too long. kinda hums in the background.
facial hair longer than like 3mm... just shave that shit off before you look like a trainspotter.

JESUS THAT IS HILARIOUS AS FUCK.

I WANT RANCH DRESSING!!!

is that some cryptic way of telling us you're crabs infested or something?! just shave it off, saves a trip to the shop... slag

LOL LOL LOL

HAHAHAHAAHA...I DID JUST GO LIKE...BALD EAGLE RECENTLY!!! How did you know?!?! My pussy is so nice and smooth right now...And I can't find anyone to fuck who doesn't want to murder me and wear my skin.  FML...seriously.  I may as well show you then.

OMG STOP DRINKING! i believe you :D hahahaha oh lawdy
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: WatLanBoon on May 12, 2013, 06:39 am
buddhist country = few and far between churches and even then it would only be on a sunday or a wedding.

not EVERY day 5 times and a monotonous moaning that only manages to attract a dozen (if that) devotees)

though i do get ya, and its not terrorism as such but its a bit much and noise pollution about covers it.

annnnnd.... it rubs the lotion on its skin ir it gets the hose again!!

Goodbye Horses!!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Afflicted_Aggressor on May 12, 2013, 12:51 pm
why u wann a beerd 4? :/
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on May 12, 2013, 08:56 pm
why u wann a beerd 4? :/

So I can go to the local supermarket and get a free cheese sample, then go round the corner and put the beard on, and come back and score another free cheese sample.

I've been working on this stealing this piece of cheese for years now, the only part I need is the fake beard, then everything will fall into place.

Muhahahaha...  AAAHHAHAHAAHAHAAHAAA!!   AAAHHHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHGAHAHAHHAHAH!!! (evil laughter echos into the darkness)

 :o
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: jundullahi on May 12, 2013, 09:29 pm
prayer calls are more noise pollution than terrorism. churches do that bell ringing shit all the fucking time, drives me insane. at least the mosques are predictably regular and don't last too long. kinda hums in the background.
facial hair longer than like 3mm... just shave that shit off before you look like a trainspotter.

JESUS THAT IS HILARIOUS AS FUCK.

I WANT RANCH DRESSING!!!

is that some cryptic way of telling us you're crabs infested or something?! just shave it off, saves a trip to the shop... slag

LOL LOL LOL

HAHAHAHAAHA...I DID JUST GO LIKE...BALD EAGLE RECENTLY!!! How did you know?!?! My pussy is so nice and smooth right now...And I can't find anyone to fuck who doesn't want to murder me and wear my skin.  FML...seriously.  I may as well show you then.


Well if the beard is nice combed and oiled and the mustache is nicely trimmed I see no reason why it should look like a trainspotter.

By the way. Many great men in history had beard Abraham Lincoln had a beard and chancellor Bismarck of Germany. Do you think Lincoln looked like a trainspotter?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on May 12, 2013, 11:16 pm
prayer calls are more noise pollution than terrorism. churches do that bell ringing shit all the fucking time, drives me insane. at least the mosques are predictably regular and don't last too long. kinda hums in the background.
facial hair longer than like 3mm... just shave that shit off before you look like a trainspotter.

JESUS THAT IS HILARIOUS AS FUCK.

I WANT RANCH DRESSING!!!

is that some cryptic way of telling us you're crabs infested or something?! just shave it off, saves a trip to the shop... slag

LOL LOL LOL

HAHAHAHAAHA...I DID JUST GO LIKE...BALD EAGLE RECENTLY!!! How did you know?!?! My pussy is so nice and smooth right now...And I can't find anyone to fuck who doesn't want to murder me and wear my skin.  FML...seriously.  I may as well show you then.


Well if the beard is nice combed and oiled and the mustache is nicely trimmed I see no reason why it should look like a trainspotter.

By the way. Many great men in history had beard Abraham Lincoln had a beard and chancellor Bismarck of Germany. Do you think Lincoln looked like a trainspotter?

KEYWORD: HISTORY. CASE. MADE. nothing more to say on the matter.
the words beard and nice don't belong in the same sentence unless you're saying 'beards sure as hell are not nice'.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: jundullahi on May 12, 2013, 11:30 pm
Well it is a difference off opinion.

Can we agree to disagree?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Ron Swanson on May 12, 2013, 11:53 pm
of course we can! we're not going to go outside and fight about it hahaha it's entirely subjective, everyone is free to have body hair wherever they choose and some suitors find that attractive i just don't get it.
and LOL fallkniven free cheese samples :D now i kinda wish i was a man so i could get loads of free cheese. i'll just strap up my boobs and get a fake beard, deli assistants need never know...
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: seuss on May 12, 2013, 11:58 pm
Men have become domesticated and feminized.  The beard is the mark of virility.  And of course, always consider the context for whether it should be sported or not.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: jundullahi on May 13, 2013, 12:18 am
Men have become domesticated and feminized.  The beard is the mark of virility.  And of course, always consider the context for whether it should be sported or not.

All so true

Did you know that Muslim men also shave there pubic hair and armpits?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: WatLanBoon on May 13, 2013, 09:04 am
Did you know that some men who are not muslim also shave their balls and armpits?

Did you also know that not all muslim men shave their pubes and pit hairs....?

Can you imagine?

i dont cos it itches when it grows back
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on May 13, 2013, 09:24 am
it sucks not being able to get a bong seal with my lips because my moustache is in the way :P not to mention setting it on fire when i try to light a roach  ;D
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: smokecrack on May 13, 2013, 10:06 am
it sucks not being able to get a bong seal with my lips because my moustache is in the way :P not to mention setting it on fire when i try to light a roach  ;D

a mouse stash? now we know youre a kid. ive had a yosemite sam mustache for years and that doesnt happen. a bong seals just fine and the most that happens is a little singed hair on a roach and thats with a massive yosimte sam mustache covering my mouth.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Afflicted_Aggressor on May 13, 2013, 10:20 am
why u wann a beerd 4? :/

So I can go to the local supermarket and get a free cheese sample, then go round the corner and put the beard on, and come back and score another free cheese sample.

I've been working on this stealing this piece of cheese for years now, the only part I need is the fake beard, then everything will fall into place.

Muhahahaha...  AAAHHAHAHAAHAHAAHAAA!!   AAAHHHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHGAHAHAHHAHAH!!! (evil laughter echos into the darkness)

 :o

You noe i gotta pay this :P

Muhahahaha...  AAAHHAHAHAAHAHAAHAAA!!   AAAHHHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHGAHAHAHHAHAH!!! (evil laughter echos into the darkness)

classic
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on May 13, 2013, 11:18 am
it sucks not being able to get a bong seal with my lips because my moustache is in the way :P not to mention setting it on fire when i try to light a roach  ;D

a mouse stash? now we know youre a kid. ive had a yosemite sam mustache for years and that doesnt happen. a bong seals just fine and the most that happens is a little singed hair on a roach and thats with a massive yosimte sam mustache covering my mouth.

Not everyone has a face shaped just like you Sam - just look at my picture! Picture that with a mU*stache/beard trying to get a good bong seal with a sweaty lip! ;)
<<<<<---------------------------------------- It could also be that my bong has an unusually large mouthpiece. I'll be fucked if i'm going to post photos of my face pubes just to defend myself against the accusations of being a child. For all we know YOU are a child!


* i was wondering why the spell checker kept highlighting moustache - thanks for the correction!
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: jundullahi on May 13, 2013, 02:43 pm
it sucks not being able to get a bong seal with my lips because my moustache is in the way :P not to mention setting it on fire when i try to light a roach  ;D

Well why dont you trim you mustache then. Solve the problem.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: Fallkniven on May 13, 2013, 11:03 pm
I was kinda overthrowing the 'bong seal' thing for comedy effect. I really hate shaving, it's too mainstream. I like being different. I do eventually trim it a little just to stop looking like a bum though ;)
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: jundullahi on May 14, 2013, 12:02 am
Yes that the way to go.

Mainstream is just too normal. Have to stand out a bit would agree?
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: KitKatisBorednow on May 14, 2013, 12:45 am
I was kinda overthrowing the 'bong seal' thing for comedy effect. I really hate shaving, it's too mainstream. I like being different. I do eventually trim it a little just to stop looking like a bum though ;)

Trimming is good.

You should try the whole heavy stubble look.  Supposedly it is the most attractive to women.  I did a little googling on that earlier and it seems they did studies that said women are most likely to find a guy with heavy stubble (they said 10 day stubble) attractive.  Men with full on beards it seems are viewed as attractive and best providers and as partners in child rearing, but they come across as aggressive or a little too masculine.  Interesting stuff.

http://io9.com/study-finds-bearded-men-are-more-attractive-proves-my-493130473
 
I have to agree...looking at the photos I would be far more likely to want to rip the guys clothes off with the "heavy stubble" it's hot as fuck.
Title: Re: Looking for a quality fake beard supplier
Post by: jundullahi on May 14, 2013, 01:13 am
I was kinda overthrowing the 'bong seal' thing for comedy effect. I really hate shaving, it's too mainstream. I like being different. I do eventually trim it a little just to stop looking like a bum though ;)

Trimming is good.

You should try the whole heavy stubble look.  Supposedly it is the most attractive to women.  I did a little googling on that earlier and it seems they did studies that said women are most likely to find a guy with heavy stubble (they said 10 day stubble) attractive.  Men with full on beards it seems are viewed as attractive and best providers and as partners in child rearing, but they come across as aggressive or a little too masculine.  Interesting stuff.

http://io9.com/study-finds-bearded-men-are-more-attractive-proves-my-493130473
 
I have to agree...looking at the photos I would be far more likely to want to rip the guys clothes off with the "heavy stubble" it's hot as fuck.


I did not know this. Thank you for the information