Silk Road forums
Discussion => Off topic => Topic started by: cerealbox on May 08, 2012, 09:47 pm
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
Woah man, youre thinking about everything the "wrong" way. Life is all about perspectives (how you view yourself, how you think the world views you, how the world actually views you, how you think other people think the world views you etc...). Don't get caught up in a negative loop in your life. Have you experimented with psychedelics at all? If you aren't connecting with very many women its either because
A. you are going after women you find attractive for the wrong reasons (meaning you have been socially programmed over life to find those sort of women attractive yet those arent ACTUALLY the women for you)
B. you overvalue sex and "hooking up" again because of how society has brought you up.
You are in your twenties now, if you can find a SINGLE women to connect with in the next 10 years you are extremely lucky... Meanwhile your friends can be going around and fucking all kinds of chicks but in all honesty that doesnt matter at all, life is about understanding yourself and making close bonds with a select few people around you.
This is a lot of rambling but damn man talk it out, feel free to PM me if you don't want to do it publicly too
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
Try kicking fuck out of someone.
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It's ok to feel lonely sometimes :)
We can give you advice on changing your life of course, like finding new companions, but becoming a blue animal is normal, think of it as a biological periodic performance review! It's perfectly natural to feel such a way, there's nothing wrong with you.
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- sit by yourself, shut out any noise, close doors etc, in silence, clear your mind of worry and stress, without thinking too hard about it
or forcing an answer, in solitude search and ask yourself honestly what makes you happy or content..
- it may take many attempts to realise.
Peace
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
Try kicking fuck out of someone.
Ah limetless i fucking love your posts some times mate, seriously this made me spurt out the tea i was just sipping. bravo +1
@OP no matter how shit things get for you there is always someone in a much much worse position, you should be grateful for what you do have not what you dont! you need a new outlook on life, take a long hard look at yourself and see what you should be grateful for
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cerealbox I recall reading your posts here and there and I always thought you seemed like a cool guy. You're on this site, so that already makes you more interesting than 95% of people. Maybe you have just not found the right friends yet...
You have a job, do you have enough money to just drop everything and move to another place? What do you have to lose at this point? Radically changing your situation in life is worth a shot. It might feel very liberating to leave behind everything you've been told to value (your job, status, women, what others think of you, etc.).
Continue experimenting with the drugs available to you on this site, especially as it seems that legal meds have not worked for you so far. Try LSD, MDMA, Ketamine or even some good cocaine if you haven't yet. I'm sure you could find someone on this site who would be willing to act as a sort of online therapist while you're under the influence, especially if you would promise to do the same for them in return.
Edit: I see in another thread that you want to try LSD. Do you need some tabs? If you feel like trusting me, I'll put two in the mail for you tomorrow. Let me know if you need my public key...
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
Try kicking fuck out of someone.
Ah limetless i fucking love your posts some times mate, seriously this made me spurt out the tea i was just sipping. bravo +1
Lol the practical solutions are the best. Just keeping it gangster! 8) :P
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Im surprised you aint whipped out your Stanleys yet
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Im surprised you aint whipped out your Stanleys yet
I almost did for USD....
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
dude take it one day at a time, i'm in the same situation as you, for the psychiatrist, women's, friends, pills every morning .. it takes time to find a treatment that works, giving up is not an option. Life is 95% shit for 5% happyness but just for that 5% it's worth everyday to be alive!
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Again I will prescribe going out and finding someone that has pissed you off and just kick the fuck out of them. Boom. Feel better.
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Again I will prescribe going out and finding someone that has pissed you off and just kick the fuck out of them. Boom. Feel better.
110% agree on this :)
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I think many of us know a thing or two about depression. Substances are a good tool to escape reality for a short time, just don't rely on them constantly or you'll quickly run out of cash and health.
You're definitely in the right place to kick depression in the nads.
Ketamine is being used to treat it these days... though acid is my sweet, sweet nectar of relief.
Trust me, a woman will not "make" you happy, you need to be comfortable with yourself. Women dig men who have confidence.
Don't worry so much about living at home though, lots of folks are doing it these days with the economic crisis BS going on. Hell, it's only really western countries that you see parents kicking their little bird out of the nest. In eastern cultures you see households of entire families living together to make ends meet and support each other. Enlightened I think.
I too am feeling somewhat burned out these days, it's like no matter how hard you try, there's always some asshole or situation waiting to suck you down into some pit of evil. The important thing to realize, just like when your tripping balls, is that most of this shit is in your head, and you can beat it with positive thinking and pornography.
Oh, and if you're on antidepressants and you want to trip balls, stop taking them for a week beforehand. Those modern antidepressants can fuck with your trips.
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Again I will prescribe going out and finding someone that has pissed you off and just kick the fuck out of them. Boom. Feel better.
Ultraviolence, ftw!
Seriously though, I can't kick the shit out of my shitty childhood.
I'd like a nice girlfriend who'll take it up the ass every now and then and swallow and we can live in the city and do drugs and I'll work my ass off every day so long as I have someone to come home to and blow my mind out with. I get this way every year around my birthday. I remember a particularly hopeful birthday. I quit smoking that year, got back in school, started working out, lost tens of pounds, got my teeth fixed etc. etc.
Maybe some people just have to give up. Hope is a burden. It gets you through the hard times, but you have to drag it along the sludge to your death.
I don't even know how I feel right now. I don't know if I'm just depressed because it's my birthday, or that for what I'm told is not an ugly shell of a body I'm unable to get laid, make meaningful connections with others, or have a good time.
I want to live in a concrete box in the sky where everyone else is so I can make a human connection. I'd like to take a girl back to my apartment and fuck her up the ass and call her a whore and make her swallow and do drugs. Then get drunk and go to sleep and go to work and school and tire myself out and be rewarded with a big juicy hamburger and a blowjob, but all I get is a lot of work at the gym and a sore body at the end of a long days work and I don't know what I can do for the economy and women hate me or don't want to date someone so far from the city or something.
I feel like if I stop caring about what happens to me something will happen to me to make it all worth while. I feel like if I give up in life and stop giving a fuck then something good will happen. I don't know how it'll manifest. More drugs, perhaps. More forceful interactions with women, less social anixety, something. I dunno. But this was a year of irony for me. This past year has been me doing what in all outward appearances should make me happy, but I am not happy. I want to get the fuck out of this town, i want to bury my face in a burger and a pussy and a beer and fuck some ass and take some drugs and puke into a dark corner on a subway ride home with friends and get up the next day motivated about mergers or escrow or stocks or something. But I am alone. My life is repetitive. Boring. Unproductive.
Hopefully some of that made sense, I did MXE and all it did was make me make less sense to people.
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“If you can't fly then run, if you can't run then walk, if you can't walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.
“Happiness is not the absence of problems, it's the ability to deal with them.”
― Steve Maraboli
“Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.”
― Siddhārtha Gautama
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
― Winston S. Churchill
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”
― Lao Tzu
“what happens when you try to run from the past? It just doesn’t catch up, it overtakes … blotting out the future.”
― Sarah Dessen,
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sniff a shit ton of ketamine you might feel better for weeks
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happy birthday cerealbox!!
i love you :-)
and i love this world, though many times i have been in your exact shoes...
"this too wil pass" has gotten be through some very hard periods, sometimes combined with 'not giving a fuck' for a bit and adjusting how many fucks i should be giving, how many fucks will make me happy. dont worry about societal happiness like others have said- that is bullshit... you gotta find it for yourself and everyone is different. keep on searching, no matter how intense or not-it varies, but keep on searching and follow your heart's clues.... slowly you will learn more of yourself and this world which in due time will make you happy as fuck!
take care bud
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There can't ever be "good times" without the "bad times", or else it would just be "time".
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yeah cereal - it's normal to get down. esp around ur bday.
simple things. try to be thankful for what you have as somebody said already.
re: girls - you've got have confidence. and you should, sounds like you've got it together.
here's a simple truth: if you see a girl you're interested in go talk to her and just say hi. if she was interested in you, if she was right for you _anything_ you say will work. if she's not, nothing you could say would work. so just give it a shot, there's nothing to lose. i'd hold off on mentioning the anal on the first go tho :P
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I was depressed for a time cerealbox. I saw a counselor and everything, but it didn't really help. I even had a girlfriend who I loved (and we're still together today) but I still had low self-esteem, I wasn't satisifed, etc. It was around that time that I first tried substances like MDMA, LSD, and mushrooms. They drastically improved my happiness and I thank them for curing my depression. So maybe try some psychedelics. I particularly recommend MDMA, just don't abuse it. I was able to limit myself to no more than once every 8 weeks and it worked well for me.
Also try to have a positive outlook on life. Think of it this way: you know that in a year, your life will be different. And in 2 years even more different. And in 5 completely different, etc. The negativity you have now is bound to pass. I mean you have a job and friends, so it's not like your life is totally in the shit. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It's a cliche, but it's true. Keep getting by however you need. Maybe get an online dating profile or something. Don't expect to find a woman who will take anal and swallow when she blows you. Lower your standards a little, go for personality more than looks and sexual leniency. All will be healed in time, you have to remember that. Things have a way of improving. To this day I look back on the years when I was suicidal and I think, "Really glad I didn't go through with it."
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I want to live in a concrete box in the sky where everyone else is so I can make a human connection. I'd like to take a girl back to my apartment and fuck her up the ass and call her a whore and make her swallow and do drugs. Then get drunk and go to sleep and go to work and school and tire myself out and be rewarded with a big juicy hamburger and a blowjob.
Inspirational words, I think that was my yearbook quote back in high school :P
But really you've got it all wrong dude. Cities suck ass. Imagine exactly what you described, the monotonous grind of daily plebeian life, except now when you come home from work frustrated you have to ride on a smelly bus or subway car packed with dreadfully annoying, sweaty people who are constantly in your way and just as frustrated and bitter as you are, only to come home to a tiny, ugly, claustrophobic concrete box. And then you go to sleep knowing that in the morning you will have to wake up at 6am and do the exact same thing. It sucks the fucking life out of you. Visit a big city, don't ever live in one.
Happy birthday if that means anything, I hope you find what you're looking for soon. I also highly recommend psychedelics if you haven't been doing that already. I know how you're feeling though, sometimes you just hit a stump in life and feel like everything is shitty. But it's an up and down thing, it'll turn around soon enough. An awesome new TV show will come on, you'll have a crazy trip, you'll find a nice young lady and stick it in her pooper or maybe you'll just have an excellent bowel movement and from then on things will start to look brighter.
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just pack up your life and move man. ive done it before. you can seriously move somewhere with like 3k.
move to a snow resort, its fun as fuck, everyone is on their own and looking to make friends and no one knows you so you can be whoever you want to be and not get stuck up on old routines.
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Again I will prescribe going out and finding someone that has pissed you off and just kick the fuck out of them. Boom. Feel better.
Lol ;D
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Try kicking fuck out of someone.
I like the way you think.
I personally did not like life until I made the conscious decision to become popular. With popularity comes the enjoyment of life.
you run in the wrong circle dude. If your friends don't like you, find new friends.
I take it you are a man, so your first goal is to move out, get a two bedroom place, then get a room mate, a attractive chick who is high energy, be picky, you want to find a party girl.
Next, DO NOT FUCK HER! If you do, make sure it is just for fun on both sides. Dating her is a bad thing to the final goal.
Now, you live with a hot chick, no parents, etc. Make your place nice. good stereo, maybe a nice big panel TV, nice style, etc.
Now lay off the weed, but dont stop smoking it, smoking weed is a good way to save money while you build a nice life up, but it is bad for having small parties with a bunch of hot bitches.
Now that you have a nice place where you can bring cute bitches home to, a hot chick there to party with, go out to where hot chicks who like to party hang out. DOWN TOWN!!! The river, the lake, etc. (also, make sure you get a house downtown)
Go there, don't go into bars, except to have a drink,
walk around, find where the cool people withuot lots of money hang out. Have a back pack with weed, maybe a fifth of something tastey, (3 olive vodka (grape flavored, peach,) is nice. Smoke cigarettes. if you dont smoke, start, thats what cool people do.
Now, find a hot guy, hot guys attract bitches, but you don't want one as your roomie as he will fuck all your bitches you bring home, not a good thing.
Talk to the guy, after a while, offer him a swig off your bottle, hit your pipe, etc.
Become known, become popular with the cool people. DON'T STARE AT HOT BITCHES unless you are going to go up and talk to them right then,
Fuck, dont know what else to say, throw a party after you are popular, get numbers, etc.
The party is where it's at. YOUR PARTY! you invite the people, you don't let your party get over run with broke ass guys who want free drinks and hit on hot chicks.
It's pretty fucking simple. Follow the plan, you will have a good time. Plus, you will get to beat the shit out of jealous guys who try t fight you because you have all the hot ladies at your house.
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oh yeah, the reason for finding that hot guy who is alone is to make a hot friend, you don;t want to be at "the spot" alone with no friends. people of the same sex as you tend to be more welcoming to talking to a new person
Also, the cigarettes really help. If you have them, broke people will ask you for one. Give them one and TALK TO THEM! Now you made a connection. If he/she is just hanging out there too, you can stay there and talk. Eventually, you will be popular.
popular people kick fucking ass.
exchange numbers, remember faces, memorize their fucking face as best you can so you can say hello to them next time.
Also, when picking up chicks, if you start talking to somebody and they aren't that recptive, they aren't interested for one reason or another, don't take it personally, move on. Eventually somebody will be receptive, there you go, if you picked wisely, you are attracted to her.
In order to make friends, get lovers, etc, you really have to make yourself have value to the other people.
Just some friendly advice from a popular party monster. ( My life is expensive, but it's worth it. Fuck, I can hardly afford it)
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Although not strictly religious in the traditional sense I am very influenced by the
Eastern teachings of Hinduism and Buddhism and I subscribe to reincarnation: not so much as a scientific fact but as a useful metaphor which reminds us of our interconnectedness with the universe. I am not interested in trying to convert you to any religion but here are some observations from an Eastern perspective:
The chances of being born into the human form is a trillion to one. As human's we have the potential to connect with the Divine spark and to finally break free from the cycle of birth and death (samsara). Take this rare opportunity to finally overcome all the suffering associated with the cycle of samsara. Much human suffering or depression is often the result of false identification with the self or the body and it's desires. Try to free yourself of the 'I' 'Me' and 'Mine' either through meditation focused on your breathing or perhaps take some 2C-E to induce this state. 2C-E has been described as one of the most beneficial and introspective of psychedelics for this very purpose. Check Erowid for the glowing reports of users of this particular substance.
Magic mushrooms are also an ancient, beneficial and organic way of reconnecting with the Earth.
And if the 'Eastern' perspective is not for you consider the conclusions of existentialism which is essentially this: we live in an absurd universe, "God is dead", and it is up to each of us to define the meaning of our own lives or to use an expression from Nietzsche: we must 'overcome' ourselves. A quote that I find very inspiring is this one from Thus Spoke Zarathustra which I can't recommend highly enough to anyone feeling blue:
"Man is something that shall be overcome. What have you done to overcome him?... All beings so far have created something beyond themselves; and do you want to be the ebb of this great flood, and even go back to the beasts rather than overcome man? What is ape to man? A laughing stock or painful embarrassment. And man shall be that to overman: a laughingstock or painful embarrassment. You have made your way from worm to man, and much in you is still worm. Once you were apes, and even now, too, man is more ape than any ape... The overman is the meaning of the earth. Let your will say: the overman shall be the meaning of the earth... Man is a rope, tied between beast and overman—a rope over an abyss ... what is great in man is that he is a bridge and not an end." (Prologue 3-4)
Another useful quote from Nietzsche is this
" The thought of suicide has gotten me through the worst of times." Meaning that as human's we have the freedom or choice to end our lives if we should so choose in less than a few minutes. However, never forget that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
If your depression is in anyway drug related (after all this is SilkRoad) and particularly if these drugs of choice are addictive in nature (Coke,Heroin,Meth) I highly recommend taking a break from that particular substance and either completely go on a detox (involving fasting, green tea,exercise, meditation,yoga, and vitamins) or use a substance like 2C-E or magic mushrooms to assist in authentic genuflecting . I suppose this is the more scientific approach of my 3 proposals to treating depression: realizing that our brains function primarily in relation to our bio-chemistry and adjusting yourself accordingly. You may also reach out to any family or friends for support.
Anyways bro, i have been a Social Worker and counselor for the last 2 decades and you are more than welcome to PM me anytime should you just wanna talk. Please do not do anything that is impulsive,ill-considered, or irreversible. Ever body gets depressed every now and then: what you are experiencing is completely normal and it will pass.
Peace be with you.
p.s. 2 pieces of music I would highly recommend is to help cure sadness is def John Coltrane's 'Love Supreme' or the 'best hits' of legendary blues musician 'Howling Wolf'
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Again I will prescribe going out and finding someone that has pissed you off and just kick the fuck out of them. Boom. Feel better.
Just make sure its an EDL or BNP member, then its a public service !
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I'd like to take a girl back to my apartment and fuck her up the ass and call her a whore and make her swallow and do drugs. Then get drunk and go to sleep and go to work and school and tire myself out and be rewarded with a big juicy hamburger and a blowjob, but all I get is a lot of work at the gym and a sore body at the end of a long days work and I don't know what I can do for the economy and women hate me or don't want to date someone so far from the city or something.
So, a female perspective...I think you need to chill.
Honestly, women are easy. To find one, I'd suggest making friends with a girl who you don't want to have sex with (and then don't have sex with her). I do this all the time for my guy friends (I work with a lot of engineers who are, er, socially challenged and I've hooked loads of them up). She'll have other friends she can introduce you too and someone in common means you can at least start a conversation with her (if confidence is an issue). Be wary if her friends start asking too many questions about her though, it means she fancies you and it'll all get messy.
Alternatively go somewhere frequented by women and see if you can get chatting to any. You can use a play to do this (i.e. take your mums cute pug dog to the park and use it as a conversation starter) or just do it with confidence. Make idle chatter with the barista in your favorite coffee shop. Frequent the same places and get to know the staff. Go to a bar and chat your heart out to the bar staff (assuming it's a woman).
OK, on to the good stuff, if you want a girl to do the "dirty stuff" with you (I'm going to read the subtext of your posts and assume that that's what you want :P ) then you need to find a girl who'll be down for that. Usually women who take drugs are more likely to be open to the things that other women scoff at. But honestly, women do also like to do those things, and if you're a considerate lover they'll be more likely to give (i.e. if every night you demand steak and a good hard deep throat finished with a facial but then the best she gets all week is a kiss on the cheek and a bit of a fondle, she'll tell you to fuck off...if you make her squirt every time, she'll give you what you want!) And if you're in a relationship with her then don't demand it rough all the time, she'll want to know you care so at least once a week break out the massage oil or something.
It's going to be difficult to find a girl who's going to admit to liking those things right out the gate - sorry. Society tells us it's dirty and we'll assume that by giving it to you right away you'll lose respect for us, or will have gotten your fill and ditch her. She may like to be called a whore but she definitely won't want you to reallllly think that after just meeting her. But once you've found someone just approach the topic gently.
In the meantime you could explore chatting online with people? Maybe webcam?
God, I'm going on, but I also wanted to say it gets better...I was on over 13 tablets a day up until last summer for mental health problems. Now I don't take any and I'm the best I've ever been. I had a lot of issues relating to sex/relationships and a difficult childhood (and it seems like you do too) and I wish I had a concrete answer as to why I got better but I don't, but I know that I definitely take a chance to smell the roses now and again. I like to break the monotony of life with things.
Anyway, if you'd like more advice or to offload then hit me a PM...I think we're quite similar. I'm a similar age, and my ideal relationship is one that's super sexual and includes a lot of drugs so I might be able to provide more of a female POV.
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Again I will prescribe going out and finding someone that has pissed you off and just kick the fuck out of them. Boom. Feel better.
Just make sure its an EDL or BNP member, then its a public service !
Exactly! Two birds, one stone, time saver! :)
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Wanna trade places? I wish i could be in your position. I can keep a job and i'm fucking up in college.
In my honest opinion, it just sounds like you need to get laid. Do some drugs and get laid. I know how it is if you haven't got some. You start wondering what the point of life is and getting down on yourself.
I hope you get feeling better, and remember that there is a lot of people that would love to be in your position.
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That's the point. On the outside my life should be fine. But I'm not happy and for some reason women want nothing to do with me. I've been doing online dating for the past year and I've probably hit on close to a thousand women. None of them want anything to do with me. I work out, I'm nice, I'm smart, I have a personality. They won't even respond to my messages. And I should be happy any way. I'm not. I can't find happiness no matter what I do. Every day is a struggle to keep slogging one more day at a time, despite the fact that life should be fine. I just don't have it in me to keep trying. I've done every thing right and the universe won't give me a break. This website is the closest thing to a break I've ever gotten actually and for this website I'm eternally grateful. But I don't think it's cutting it.
tl;dr
of course I should be happy. that's the point. I'm not. I do everything right and nothing I do is good enough.
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I know you may have heard this before? But why not give internet dating a shot, I know plenty of people in their 30's who are in the same position as you, they just can't seem to meet the right person, On-line dating gets you out and about, you get to practice 'people' skills and you'll probably get laid too...
You need to unplug now and again. from real life, and from the net... The key is balance, as with everything in life!!
Everything in moderation... Everything!
Chin up mate... My best mate went 6 years with not even a sniff! He's getting back on the horse now though, and his social skills are somewhat lacking (I.E - First date, drinks over 6 pints and wonders why his date left early)
Hope this helps.. You need to gain some perspective, try and look at your situation and see the best bits, rather than the worst!
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bugger... You've already tried it... My fault for writing an essay!
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Ok i got something i want you to try.
1.Get a drug that is a stimulant. MDPV is pretty cheap or 4fa. Really any type of stimulant that produces euphoria and makes you want more after you are high.
2.Do some of those drugs in front of the girl you want to hook up with. Only share a little bit and act like you don't want to. (Even though you don't mind sharing.)
3. When she starts coming down she'll want more. This is where you act like a stingy asshole complaining about how you only have a little bit and you already shared. She'll be really sweet and flirty wanting more. If she overs to buy it off you. Say you don't want to sale because it's your last bit. (even if it's not.)
Then, tell her if she wants more, she'll have to dance for it. She might look at you like what the fuck? Just laugh and tell her your serious. You wouldn't believe how many times this has worked for me. Even if she just does a playful dance, and not a sexy one. It puts attention on her, let's her know you find her attractive. If she does a good job of dancing, then give her some more. Then work your way from there.
The reason i say ask her to dance. It's not as rude as asking her to fuck for drugs lol. It also helps her loosen up and allows her to be more comfortable with acting like herself around you. The more comfortable she feels, the more likely hood you have of getting laid.
This might make me sound like a pig, but i had a friend who attempted suicide. Thank god they were able to get him to the hospital and pump his stomach in time. I told him to do the what i told you after he got out of the hospital. I think he used cocaine as his choice of stimulant. He ended up getting some and he's doing a lot better. He thanked me for that and told me about how he hadn't been laid in over six months before that night.
I'm telling you, it's in our nature to fuck. It's something we have to do to continue feeling like are life is meaningful. And, who knows. The girl you get to dance, you might really connect with and they might turn out to be your soul mate. (If you believe in that kind of thing.)
Sometimes you just need to get laid, no matter what the cost. No matter how much of an asshole you seem lol.
Then again, i might just be an asshole haha.
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I'm not. I do everything right and nothing I do is good enough.
You really should rethink that. Life is a game and the way you "win" it is to enjoy yourself. If you're not enjoying yourself, you're not really doing it "right". Something is only "right" if it's making you happier.
And it can be tricky. You could make a choice that's painful in the near future but gives you pride for the rest of your life. You can seek out weak girls with mental problems and have sex with them tonight and wake up disgusted with them and yourself, or you can spend months or years improving yourself enough to win the love of a kind, brave, smart, courageous girl you really adore.
I got knocked down by life two years ago and I'm still getting out of the ditch. It sucks. But I try to make time to do stuff that really makes me happy, even if it's obvious it's a "waste" of time (when people say this, they usually mean it doesn't help your career). But it's not a waste of time if it's making you happy.
I think you should rethink and accept that whatever you've been doing has not really been right, at least not right for winning at life by getting happiness. Use your strong brain to change your habits to unashamedly gather up happiness like it's gold, wherever it may be found.
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sniff a shit ton of ketamine you might feel better for weeks
I had some of Freedompeoples Ketamine if I remember correctly the seller. Not my thing really in small doses makes me sedated and delirous. I took one semi-large line, similar size as small coke lines and damn that hole was deep. Its funny I got this huge "whooosh!" sound in my ears when it started.
I dont suffer from depression, but I have other problems and I dont really buy that it somehow helps depression. Atleast not for me personally.
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
Try kicking fuck out of someone.
No but on a serious note, THIS, for sure. Get in a fight and just beat the living shit outta someone then come back and tell me that don't change your fuckin perception of yourself.
Or you could be a pussy and "think." Eh.
To be honest don't let that pussy shit overcome you. If you have nothing wrong with you i.e. you ain't in a wheelchair, you're healthy, you're relatively intelligent and you know how to put in work, you shouldn't be complaining like a bitch. Go out and get what you want and don't expect it to come to you. Cuz for all the work you put in you're not gonna get shit from nobody - in fact, you might get more shit, because people will expect more of you. Stand the fuck up and quit sulking. You ain't got a crackwhore mama. You aint rottin in jail. You don't live in an area where you get mugged every time you go outside (or at least i think u dont)! Life is good motherfucker, and if you can't appreciate that, nobody here can do anything for you.
But on some real shit I kinda liked the guy's comment who said you gotta really think about what YOU want, what makes YOU happy, man. Cuz once you figure that out you can spend the rest of your life tryin to get it. And the hunt is always thousands of times better than the reward, that's real talk.
Be well, and if you don't wanna be well, go fuck yourself.
Love,
HH
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That's the point. On the outside my life should be fine. But I'm not happy and for some reason women want nothing to do with me. I've been doing online dating for the past year and I've probably hit on close to a thousand women. None of them want anything to do with me. I work out, I'm nice, I'm smart, I have a personality. They won't even respond to my messages. And I should be happy any way. I'm not. I can't find happiness no matter what I do. Every day is a struggle to keep slogging one more day at a time, despite the fact that life should be fine. I just don't have it in me to keep trying. I've done every thing right and the universe won't give me a break. This website is the closest thing to a break I've ever gotten actually and for this website I'm eternally grateful. But I don't think it's cutting it.
tl;dr
of course I should be happy. that's the point. I'm not. I do everything right and nothing I do is good enough.
happiness is an inside job. just know that even though i dont know you personally i want you to be happy and want the best for you
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Thanks for your concern everyone. I'm feeling better these days. I guess it really was just turning 26 that made me depressed. Life is getting better the more I work at it, it'll just take some patience.
Oh yeah, not to mention that giving up enabled me to change my profile to something honest and open (such as the fact that I love drugs and am looking for someone into kinky sex) which has gotten me a first date with an awesome girl next week.
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
I'm 30 now. When i was in college things started to get tougher for me. I was in and out of depression, couldn't focus in school, missed lots of class. If it wasn't for my brains and determination to get through i wouldn't have. But at that time i was very ignorant of how to deal with these types of mental problems and when i got my first job out of school it was a shit show. The put up with me not showing up a lot and screwing up because again, people saw a lot of potential in me.
But eventually my mental health broke down even more. I did some traveling, racked up some debt and eventually wound up back with my parent and broke.
Every time i tried to go to them with a problem i couldn't quite describe they always seemed to make it out to be my fault and tried to 'discipline' me into a better situation. It got bad, i didn't shower i sat in the basement on the computer smelly in old clothes. All my dad knew how to do was come downstairs every other day and start yelling at me and telling me that things 'couldn't go on like that.' It was all he knew, and i could see that one day my parents were going to push me over the edge making me feel bad about myself and i'd kill myself.
So i chose to live in my car (only thing to my name) rather than deal with my less than understanding and supportive parents and family.
There were some dark times in that car, it was cold, sometimes i didn't have cigarettes. There was more than one night i sat in that car with my gun in my mouth.
Thankfully i didn't do it. I was guided to work with a therapist who himself had a rough time as a teenager (sever bi-polar) and he managed to overcome and find the right meds, even after multiple doctors told his mother that there was no way he could ever live a normal life and would need assistance permanently. He put me in touch wiht a nurse practitioner who knew her meds inside and out (she actually teaches pharmacology at a local university). It took some trial and error over a year or so, but ultimately we figured out that i was bi-polar with some ADD symptoms as well and the right combo of meds,
I started taking 5 mg zyprexa (anti-psychotic, yes yes people have bad things to say about APs but some people like me really do need them). I also took some prozac and adderall as needed. Now i've tuned it a bit and take half the zyprexa i used to and successfully swapped out the prozac for 5-htp which seems to work about as well.
So whats the point of all this?
1) I was very reticent to get the right help because i underestimated what the *right* drugs could do to greatly improve my life.
2) I was so sick that i ddin't really even know it was all in my head all along
And those are the two biggest issues facing people like us. Its hard to recognize the problem. And frankly most people perscribing these psychoactives do not know what they are doing.
What you need to do i find the right psychiatrist. One who knows her drugs well. You need to carefully and slowly try different therapies, dosage, combos and keep steady notes. Have goal as to what you think you need to fix with you mental/emotional health. Keep track of which drugs help you get there and which push you in the wrong direction or have bad side effects.
As per the SR substances. Avoid anything addictive. One poster mentioned cocain. DO NOT GET INTO COKE DUDE> Its very addictive. Stick to the drugs w/o withdrawal and ones that could interact with whatever else you've been perscribed. Try to find a pdoc that's open to a patient using mushroom/lsd/and other psychedelics. i've never done those. But i've found that my prescribed meds, supplements and an occasional toke of cannabis do everything i need.
Today I'd say i'm functioning almost as good as when i was a teenager, and emotionally much more balanced than ive ever been even going back to childhood.
Try to remain positive, if i had to play armchair pdoc, i'd say you are suffering from some depression. Your perspective seems very negative and hopeless. Consider trying some 5-htp (over the counter, but be carefull because it acts essentially like an SSRI in some, and if you are taking ssri's you should cut your dosage for a week or two before trying it).
You may also need a mood stabilizer (ant-psychotic) which act on dopamine. Abilify works great if its a depression thing along with an ssri. The zyprexa (olanzapine) i take is great if your symptoms are unstable mood with big ups and downs and getting upset and emotional easily.
Lastly, listen to me dude, ive been there, the dark places where you feel hopeless. I was once a scary looking homeless dude in my truck. Now I'm not scary to people, i don't mumble to myself constantly, and i'm not looking to off myself.
Right now i'm working a crap job, but i feel good about my future in the long term.
Find a friend or relative or pastor or whoever you feel you can talk about these things with. And outside perspecitve is important. Ask people close to you what they think your challenges are, what they think could be wrong with you. You sound like you simply might be sick, you can be fixed. If i can, if my bipolar therapist who was so delusional when he was a teen would wonder off pretending he was filming a movie for days can be fixed, you can too! Takes time and the right people helping. Don't give up!
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I'm telling you, it's in our nature to fuck. It's something we have to do to continue feeling like are life is meaningful. And, who knows. The girl you get to dance, you might really connect with and they might turn out to be your soul mate. (If you believe in that kind of thing.)
Sadly, this guy is right. It sucks, but I really think this is how us guys are put together.
I strongly empathize with your position, cerealbox. I am working through similar problems myself, except without the pills and psychiatric help.
I think you're right about something.
Giving up can help. (I don't mean this in a way that condones suicide)
If you give up, you're free to go be yourself however it comes out. If you can bring yourself to not care, women will notice, and that ultimately makes them wonder WHY you don't care and if they can MAKE you care. Reverse polarity. I've accidentally pulled it off many times in my life, but when I'm trying it don't do shit for me, and I'm trying really hard right now.
Putting yourself out there, while simultaneously conveying the impression that you don't care, is not easy for me. I feel like the fact that I'm even talking to someone at all shows that I do care.
The problem is how to make yourself not care. It's alot easier said than done, because of the truth in dude's quote above.
This whole thread has inspired me to go give okcupid another shot. Go check out that site if you haven't yet, www.okcupid.com
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Wow, some very interesting texts/posts in here.
But no one can really understand those situations like the thread opener is in.
I feel exactly the same, but my situation is even worse ;)
Many personality disorders, no social integration, contacts, women et cetera.
Job and/or money means fairly nothing in order to make someone happy who is on the borderline to suicide.
My (additional) problem for example is that no drugs work (legal and illegal) and I won't quit my life without drugs. It's just impossible. I would pay a lot of money to just find the right (working) drug.
cerealbox, the key would be to give a fucking shit about everything, stop being anxious, stop think about everything, just do what you want to. That would help, BUT it's very very very very difficult. Personally, I couldn't manage to give a fuck about everything, because I can't handle kickbacks.
Life is getting better the more I work at it, it'll just take some patience.
But I really don't understand this. Your life is so fucked up since ever and now it's suddenly changing? Lucky guy, very lucky guy ;)
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Cerealbox, it appears you've been given some great advice. Particularly from war, aligibbs, and trippyskies. I'd +1 you guys if I could, not that it actually means anything... but I wanted to say you three had a combination of some good stuff. Violence isn't the answer, but blowing off some steam like that does prove effective sometimes, so you could go try and find a fight club, but chances are you won't, since nobody will break the first rule. :P
DigitalEntity forgot: "A rolling stone gathers no moss." Sounds like you've been collecting some moss, buddy.
I'd offer some of my thoughts but as I said I think war/aligibbs/trippyskies pretty much nailed it. Hope things are getting brighter for you. Happy birthday, and it's good to hear you got yourself a date!
ps. Yes, cocaine is a TERRIBLE idea, might as well get on some H too, and woo, problems solved!!! For a month or two. Then you're really fucked.
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Life is getting better the more I work at it, it'll just take some patience.
But I really don't understand this. Your life is so fucked up since ever and now it's suddenly changing? Lucky guy, very lucky guy ;)
My life isn't fucked up. By all intents and purposes I should be happy. I've accomplished many of my goals: going to school, getting my first girlfriend, quitting smoking, losing weight, taking better care of myself, getting a job, etc. But there's still a lingering ennui and depression that I can't quite shake. A hidden discontentment that's there whenever I think about it, but that I can sufficiently distract myself from. Hope keeps me going. I was much, much happier when I had a girlfriend (I don't believe in this you don't need a man/woman to be happy stuff; we're social creatures). I hope that I can find a good girlfriend, and eventually college won't suck so much once I transfer and hopefully I can get a good job and live on my own and then the lingering will go away. But when an occasion comes around to take stock of how I feel, I don't feel satisfied. Hopefully if I can manage to stay motivated and stay positive I can shake was has so far been a life without joy and finally make it worth living.
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You need to learn a lot and stop declaring your views as facts.
You don't need a partner to be happy. You = a normal/healthy person
Your life is pretty much fucked up as you described it in your first post, yes.
You've had a girlfriend? Congratulations.
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cerealbox, every post you make feels like it's me posting.
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If your Candadian we should so totally hang out, cuz what you described is exactly what my life is too :(.
Sucks the balls for sure bro, only comfort i've gotten is being around others if I can even do that. I feel for you bro :/
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Cerealbox,
Just wanted to make a couple of comments regarding your state of mind...
You seem to place uber-importance on having a partner, like you need one to complete you somehow, but this is really not the case at all. Two people do not complete one another- they compliment one another. It isn't that you NEED the other half of a circle to complete your half, it's that you need to complete your own circle on your own. Eventually, you'll meet someone who is a complete circle independent of anyone else, and you two will form concentric circles that compliment one another in a way you never imagined.
Be your own person. Find your own way. Develop your own interests, and foster the development of them. Right now, you seem to be predicating your own happiness on the acceptance of you by another person. You need to learn to be happy on your own. Otherwise, you project your own unhappiness, and even your desperation, to those same women you want to interact with. These qualities are universally regarded as unattractive (not saying you are personally- only the aura you project)
Attraction is a force all its own. It isn't rational, can't be controlled or directed. It can seldom even be denied. Women do not choose who they are attracted to- they just are, or they are not. Happy, content, complete people project an aura of confidence- which most definitely IS universally accepted as being an attractive quality...
Do you see what I'm getting at? It might take a long, long time to find what you think you so desperately want RIGHT NOW... Maybe even a lifetime. But it doesn't mean that you can't be, or shouldn't be, a complete and happy person in the interim. Focus on yourself, but be sensitive to the needs and expectations of those around you. It WILL happen as soon as you stop looking for it...
EDIT: I didn't mean to suggest that you'll find what you're looking for simply BECAUSE you stop looking for it, or immediately after. But when you stop focusing on having a relationship, you have all that time to focus on completing yourself- and you'll be a happier person because of it. When that transformation happens, people will begin to look at you in a different light, and the rules of attraction will change.
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if I could +1 cacoethes permanently for the above, I would.
I don't give assurances that it WILL happen when you stop looking for it, but otherwise I second what s/he said.
side note - Tim Minchin has a brilliant song on this; search for "If I didn't have you."
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if I could +1 cacoethes permanently for the above, I would.
I don't give assurances that it WILL happen when you stop looking for it, but otherwise I second what s/he said.
side note - Tim Minchin has a brilliant song on this; search for "If I didn't have you."
Thanks, thyme!
I clarified my last statement, since it was rather poorly worded!
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pills might help in the short-term, but really do more harm than good in the long run. western medicine is great for treating... not so much for curing. i have found psychedelics to be invaluable tools for healing. i'll take my plant teachers over pharmaceuticals any day.
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Life is what you make it.
Take a trip to your local ghetto, or better yet, take a trip to a burgeoning metropolis in a 2nd or 3rd world country. That will put shit in perspective. It will humble you to your very core to see people who literally have nothing, to see people who can't even control their own lives, their own destinies.
You're lucky you can choose to better yourself like you did, you're lucky you have the CHOICE to be able to go to school and get your teeth fixed.
You're lucky your only problems are trying to get laid and finding a life partner and making friends.
You don't have to worry about finding food, eating the most disgusting things with relish because you can't afford anything else, things we throw away and take for granted.
You don't have to worry about fighting for your own god damned survival, like animals forced into confines with each other, killing each other for scraps, dying from disease, malnourishment and dehydration because there is NO FOOD, NO CLEAN WATER, and NO MEDICAL ANYTHING, not even bandages or the simple pills in a bottle we take for granted to take away a headache.
But you can't get an idea just from my words, you can't get an idea from seeing the sad 'donate a meal to starving African children' commercials where you quickly avert your eyes or quickly change the channel so you don't feel the shame or guilt of seeing fellow human beings in such a horrid state of being.
You have to see it with your own eyes, and I believe you should. Walking down the street of a small town, with no running water, no electricity on a hot 40c day and 80% humidity, a small trench for your shit and piss runs parallel to the street, spreading disease and horrible smell, polluting the only sources of water around for miles, mounds and mounds of trash piled on the corner of every alleyway, smelling like death incarnate because there is no one to pick it up, sweltering there in the heat for months. Ramshackle houses that are occupied by families so large, you can't decyfer the lineage, built from the refuse of other nations into something resembling a residency.
Nope, all you have to worry about is your self image, what shoes you're gonna wear today, which girl you are going to try and impress with your knowledge and witty jokes.
1st world life is about competition, professionally, personally, sexually, spiritually. You must try and make yourself the best you can be so people will like you. That's what all the media tells us right?
Life... is about competition. And I'd say life is pretty fucking good.
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Just like the others have said, try you out some psychadelics. Mushrooms are my favorite by far when it comes to figuring out how to proceed. You get to see the world, and yourself, from a different perspective. One without preconceived ideas, or any trace of your own ego. (which can be a little frightening to some).
Or, you could just go kick the fuck out of someone like Limitless said. It really feels good, if they deserved it.
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Not quite sure how I was trying to make him feel bad about his life.
I'm trying to show him that his life, in fact, is not that bad. Quite the opposite actually.
I was in his same shoes and what I just wrote is how I got over it. And I never forgot it.
It has helped me remind myself everyday, that despite the petty shit we see in our day to day lives, things could be so much worse.
SO much worse.
Edit: and how is my suggestion so much worse than the people saying go beat someone up, or the guy who is clearly a PUA saying go party and become popular? or the guy who said to blackmail a girl into having sex with him for drugs.
They're all opinions anyway.
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Not quite sure how I was trying to make him feel bad about his life.
I'm trying to show him that his life, in fact, is not that bad. Quite the opposite actually.
I was in his same shoes and what I just wrote is how I got over it. And I never forgot it.
It has helped me remind myself everyday, that despite the petty shit we see in our day to day lives, things could be so much worse.
SO much worse.
Honestly, having been at the bottom myself, it isn't that encouraging to just look around and see how bad the world is. Although I completely agree with what you said.
I especially like the following:
Nope, all you have to worry about is your self image, what shoes you're gonna wear today, which girl you are going to try and impress with your knowledge and witty jokes.
Yet, as I said, just looking around at the bad in the world while you're at your all time low isn't too positive. It only seems to help while you're at your at a good point in your life. It may help you see the good things you have while you compare your life with others. Just IMO isn't good while you aren't doing good, at least it wouldn't help me.
Honestly OP, if you feel like you're giving up, stop trying to please anyone else. Stop trying to set out to get these little personal goals and just go out and figure yourself out. Change something. Change your lifestyle, surroundings, do whatever you can that isn't like you are now. Obviously you're not happy with everything you have around currently, so change it completely and go from there. It may seem dramatic, but if you've really given up on everything, you have nothing to lose.
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Tomorrow I am officially in my late twenties. I've done every thing right for the past two years. I go to the gym 4 times a week, I eat right, I went back to school, I got a job, I went to a psychiatrist, I take my pills every morning, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. But life still sucks. I've managed to do accomplish all the goals on my end, but have gotten nothing for it. I still live at home, women want nothing to do with me, my friends never have any time for me, I get up every day and I don't know how I can keep on giving 100% every day. I am burnt out. I'm sick of trying and not getting anything in return. So I'm going to stop trying. I give up. Fuck everything.
dude take it one day at a time, i'm in the same situation as you, for the psychiatrist, women's, friends, pills every morning .. it takes time to find a treatment that works, giving up is not an option. Life is 95% shit for 5% happyness but just for that 5% it's worth everyday to be alive!
+1 bro!
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It's all good. Like I said, these are all suggestions by people who have been in the same situation.
Cerealbox should read this and come to a solution that works for him, either by trying out the suggestions made, or analyzing all of it and coming up with his own ideas.
Everything I said worked for me, as I'm sure the stuff others have said worked for them.
I wish Cerealbox the best and hopes he finds what hes looking for.
I do know that what he's looking for wont be found in a vagina though.
Or maybe it is, ahaha.
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Life is what you make it.
Take a trip to your local ghetto, or better yet, take a trip to a burgeoning metropolis in a 2nd or 3rd world country. That will put shit in perspective. It will humble you to your very core to see people who literally have nothing, to see people who can't even control their own lives, their own destinies.
You're lucky you can choose to better yourself like you did, you're lucky you have the CHOICE to be able to go to school and get your teeth fixed.
You're lucky your only problems are trying to get laid and finding a life partner and making friends.
You don't have to worry about finding food, eating the most disgusting things with relish because you can't afford anything else, things we throw away and take for granted.
You don't have to worry about fighting for your own god damned survival, like animals forced into confines with each other, killing each other for scraps, dying from disease, malnourishment and dehydration because there is NO FOOD, NO CLEAN WATER, and NO MEDICAL ANYTHING, not even bandages or the simple pills in a bottle we take for granted to take away a headache.
But you can't get an idea just from my words, you can't get an idea from seeing the sad 'donate a meal to starving African children' commercials where you quickly avert your eyes or quickly change the channel so you don't feel the shame or guilt of seeing fellow human beings in such a horrid state of being.
You have to see it with your own eyes, and I believe you should. Walking down the street of a small town, with no running water, no electricity on a hot 40c day and 80% humidity, a small trench for your shit and piss runs parallel to the street, spreading disease and horrible smell, polluting the only sources of water around for miles, mounds and mounds of trash piled on the corner of every alleyway, smelling like death incarnate because there is no one to pick it up, sweltering there in the heat for months. Ramshackle houses that are occupied by families so large, you can't decyfer the lineage, built from the refuse of other nations into something resembling a residency.
Nope, all you have to worry about is your self image, what shoes you're gonna wear today, which girl you are going to try and impress with your knowledge and witty jokes.
1st world life is about competition, professionally, personally, sexually, spiritually. You must try and make yourself the best you can be so people will like you. That's what all the media tells us right?
Life... is about competition. And I'd say life is pretty fucking good.
Haha, im in a third world country... And just btw it's awesome! So much corruption I never have to worry about being caught and even if I do it's only a couple grand and I was never even there! Besides im connected enough as well... Plus, there's no competition here so the entire market is mine!
My advice is move to a third world country (In Africa preferably) and start dealing - not one at a time, get mules to do the shit work for you! :D Get connected and make lots of CA$H!!!
Cheers,
The Godfather
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Edit: and how is my suggestion so much worse than the people saying go beat someone up, or the guy who is clearly a PUA saying go party and become popular?
I spent about a couple months studying PUA pretty intently. Read "The Game," which is an amazing read in its own right. I highly recommend you read this book cerealbox, if nothing else it will at least make you feel better for a short period of time. Go get it, now. "The Game" by Neil Strauss. I read alot of mystery shit, and some juggler shit, and a bunch of other random shit. Watched videos. There's an endless amount of PUA material out there. It gets hard to filter the quality from the crap, but I've at least skimmed most of it.
I feel like I understand much more about the topic than most people do, even "naturals," the guys who do it without knowing it.
To my dismay, I still can't make it work in real life. I don't even understand why. I'm good looking, understand everything in theory, but the practical applications of this knowledge still eludes me.