Someone very close to me has borderline personality disorder, and that sounds spot on, the whole lack of control of impulses thing. Actually, a lot of stalkers have BPD, which is neither here nor there. Well, it's sort of relevant to me. She used to threaten suicide all the time too, and you can never be sure how serious they are about that. There's also a high correlation between drug abuse and mental illness, ie people with existing psychiatric problems self-medicate with illicit drugs, so it shouldn't be surprising if such people are overrepresented in this community. Anyway, best of luck kitkat, and I hope you find the help and peace of mind that you need.